Becoming disillusioned with sameness is part of human
nature. When we like something, we want more of it and we irrationally assume
that our enthusiasm should be able to sustain itself without much effort.
We love to be surprised,
aroused, and stimulated because it distracts us from the ordinariness of life.
In this contest we are going to see the chemistry of our body. There are a lot
of chemicals racing around your brain and body when we are in love. Our body is
build up with sensory receptors that send messages via sensory neurons and
nerves to our brain, when they are stimulated by love.
Researchers are still
learning more and more about the roles this chemicals release by our body play
both when we are falling in love and when we're in long-term relationships. estrogen and testosterone play a role in the sex drive area. Without them, we might
never venture into the "real love" arena.
That initial giddiness
that comes when we're first falling in love includes a racing heart, flushed skin and sweaty palms. Researchers say this is due to the
dopamine, norepinephrine and phenylethylamine we're releasing. Dopamine is thought to be the "pleasure
chemical," producing a feeling of bliss. Norepinephrine is similar to adrenaline and produces
the racing heart and excitement. According to Helen Fisher,
anthropologist and well-known love researcher from Rutgers University, together
these two chemicals produce elation, intense energy, sleeplessness, craving,
loss of appetite and focused attention. She also says, "The human body
releases the cocktail of love rapture only when certain conditions are met and
... men more readily produce it than women, because of their more visual
nature."
Researchers are using functional magnetic resonance imaging (fMRI) to watch people's brains when they look at a photograph of their object of affection. According to Helen Fisher, a well-known love researcher and an anthropologist at Rutgers University, what they see in those scans during that "crazed, can't-think-of-anything-but stage of romance" -- the attraction stage -- is the biological drive to focus on one person. The scans showed increased blood flow in areas of the brain with high concentrations of receptors for dopamine -- associated with states of euphoria, craving and addiction. High levels of dopamine are also associated with norepinephrine, which heightens attention, short-term memory, hyperactivity, sleeplessness and goal-oriented behavior. In other words, couples in this stage of love focus intently on the relationship and often on little about their partner. else.
Another possible explanation for the
intense focus and idealizing view that occurs in the attraction stage comes
from researchers at University College London. They discovered that people in
love have lower
levels of serotonin and also that neural circuits associated
with the way we assess others are suppressed. These lower serotonin levels are
the same as those found in people with obsessive-compulsive
disorders, possibly explaining why those in love obsess.
|
Love Junkies
There are those who may
be addicted to that love "high." They need that amphetamine-like
rush of dopamine, norepinephrine and phenylethylamine. Because the body
builds up a tolerance to these chemicals, it begins to take more and more to
give love junkies that high. They go through relationship after relationship
to get their fix.
|
In romantic love, when two people have sex, oxytocin is released, which helps bond the
relationship. According to researchers at the University of California, San
Francisco, the hormone oxytocin has been shown to be "associated with the
ability to maintain healthy interpersonal relationships and healthy
psychological boundaries with other people." When it is released during
orgasm, it begins creating an emotional bond -- the more sex, the greater the
bond. Oxytocin is also associated with mother/infant bonding, uterine
contractions during labor in childbirth and the "let down" reflex
necessary for breastfeeding.
Vasopressin, an antidiuretic hormone, is another chemical that has been
associated with the formation of long-term, monogamous relationships. Dr.
Fisher believes that oxytocin and vasopressin interfere with the dopamine and
norepinephrine pathways, which might explain why passionate love fades as
attachment grows.
Endorphins, the body's natural painkillers, also play a key role in
long-term relationships. They produce a general sense of well-being, including
feeling soothed, peaceful and secure. Like dopamine and norepinephrine,
endorphins are released during sex; they are also released during physical
contact, exercise and other activities. According to
Michel Odent of London's Primal Health Research Center, endorphins induce a
"drug-like dependency."
What about when that euphoric feeling is gone? According to
Ted Huston at the University of Texas, the speed at which courtship progresses
often determines the ultimate success of the relationship. What they found was
that the longer the courtship, the stronger the long-term relationship.
The feelings of passionate love, however, do lose their
strength over time. Studies have shown that passionate love fades quickly and
is nearly gone after two or three years. The chemicals responsible for
"that lovin' feeling" (adrenaline, dopamine, norepinephrine,
phenylethylamine, etc.) dwindle. Suddenly your lover has faults. Why has he or
she changed, you may wonder. Actually, your partner probably hasn't changed at
all; it's just that you're now able to see him or her rationally, rather than
through the blinding hormones of infatuation and passionate love. At
this stage, the relationship is either strong enough to endure, or the
relationship ends.
If the relationship can advance, then other chemicals kick
in. Endorphins, for example, are still providing a sense of well-being and
security. Additionally, oxytocin is still released when you're having sex, producing feelings of satisfaction and attachment.
Vasopressin also continues to play a role in attachment.
Comments